I AM WOMAN…HEAR ME ROAR
I learned something this last week that absolutely and completely blew my mind. In fact, I had what I like to call a `blinding flash of the obvious (BFO)`last night. It illustrated to me the complete and total power we have in life and that is the power to choose.
I, like others, have experienced times in my life where I think….”why me?”… “what have I done to deserve this?”…”I can’t take this anymore”… ” I am sick and tired of (fill in the blank)”. These statements and more like them are self-defeating. They lead to one thing, which is a feeling of powerlessness, or hopelessness. A lack of control over our destiny and our lives. When we are powerless, we put our lives into the hands of others or the universe or anything else that we feel will guide us on a proper path. Yet really, is this the path WE should be on or a path laid out by circumstances and nothing more?
Now, I acknowledge that for a part of my life, it was my need to control that got me into trouble. There was also a point in my life where I believed that accepting my “powerlessness” would free me. I have, as they say, seen the light. Powerlessness to me now means an acceptance of present circumstances. Acceptance of present circumstances means that although I may not like it, I have to make a conscious effort, in spite of judgements of whether something is good, bad or indifferent, to accept the situation as it is. I am powerless. This leads me to resignation with flashes of “why me?” etc. When I am resigned, it means I will not constantly rail against something, I will take it as it comes. It means that occasionally, I will sit on what someone once succinctly called a pity pot and when I was finished pouting I would get up, shove my feelings aside and resignedly accept the circumstance and my life with the situation as it was, evolving completely out of my control. I would allow life to drain me as I was powerless but I would keep going. No More! I am taking back the control of my destiny and categorically state that the possibility I am creating for my life is the possibility of living an engaging, positive and powerful life.
A few weeks ago, someone taught me that you could live an upset free life. It was confusing, unnerving. I didn’t get it. After all, what could I do to stop what another person was doing or saying? How did I have any control over what was happening. What could I possibly do to affect change when each of us can only work with and deal with ourselves? After all, we cannot control other people or the things they do and say. Yet it is in this place of disturbance, this state of discord, that the space for choosing to stand up for what I want, need and believe to be true for my life, happens.
Are you confused????? I understand, I was there. I get it. In fact, even as I get it I have moments of confusion. Learning to live a new way and think a new way is not always easy. We let the past, the noise, the blame, guilt, self-recrimination, memories, hurts, and anything else we want to call up from within us, affect our thinking now. Yet if we are to succeed in living powerfully, we need to live NOW. That’s right, NOW! That last sentence is not now, it’s over, it’s done, it’s preserved by writing but you already read it in the past.
When we live in the past we miss out because we are looking backwards. When we live in the future, we are missing out because the future has not yet happened and living there can lead to fear, worry, anxiety….what will happen, will it be alright, what will I do IF? You cannot live in the future and again, it robs you of power because you are not living NOW. Living in the NOW means being very aware of where you are and what you are doing. Now, the world doesn’t ask for permission or input to have something bad happen. Just as something that may be bad to us, is not bad for the world. Just because an earthquake damages our homes, or a volcano grounds flights, these are not bad things for the world, they are normal occurences for the Earth therefore they are neither bad nor good. They are what they are. What this means is that you live in the moment. Have goals, create possibilities for your future and set out the steps you need to get there. Have a plan and keep it alive by making it real and present to you. Just don’t let lingering in the past or worrying about the future bog you down.
I remember a time before this, when something happened and it was horrible. I had moved out of my parents home. It was Christmas. I was alone in my own apartment. My mother had suffered a heart attack on December 19. My father was angry with me as he felt it was all my fault for leaving home and causing them stress (I was 18). Now, I didn’t know what I know now and I had a real low self-esteem as well as a lot of guilt. On Christmas Eve, I left the hospital to come back to my apartment. I stopped at a convenience store, picked up a fancy frozen dinner (Steak tips) and a couple Christmas movies to pop into the VCR. I watched one movie, ate my meal and started feeling sorry for myself. I had a dog and he started whining for a walk. It was close to midnight and we headed out into the cold bright night. As we walked it started to snow, those big fluffy flakes that remind one of soft glistening cotton. I stopped in a deserted park by a church to have a sit down and watch the dog roll around and run in the snow trying in vain to bite the flakes. The church was lit up, light streaming through stain glass windows. I felt quiet, sad, really starting to feel sorry for myself…then I heard the strains of Silent Night as the people inside the stone church began to sing carols. I looked up at the sky…it was of course overcast, but the moon was doing its’ best to peek through. The dog came over, sat beside me and I allowed myself, just for that little bit, to take in everything without letting what was going on intrude. I heard the music, I felt the snowflakes and my dogs’ wet head nudging my hand, I saw the glow of the many colors in the windows…and to this day, it still remains vivid and one of the best Christmas memories I have. I was actually able to feel the spirit of “peace on earth good will towards men”.
This is only because for a brief time I allowed myself to live IN THE MOMENT. If I had wallowed in worry and fear and regret, and continued to let my mind be overwhelmed with “thinking” I would have missed all of that. I cannot say that I have been very good at doing that since then, and I certainly didn’t learn what a gift that was, but it is something I am sincerely practising now. Today. Living in the moment. Now, today, this moment, I HAVE THE POWER TO CHOOSE. Choose without judgment, without labels but choose to live now and enjoy what is happening now…the alive sounds of a dog barking outside, the stillness of the empty office, the clacking of my keyboard as I write this. All of it is to some degree peaceful to me. I have alot of chaos going on in my life today…family issues, a child suffering with a recently diagnosed mental illness which requires that I deal with therapists, counsellors and school officials almost daily, a messy house that if I let it will drive me crazy, my elderly mother with her very bad heart problems and now cancer, my husband and his personal and business worries. Believe me, if I want to create drama, chaos or insanity in my life, I have a number of areas to choose from. Yet I will not choose those things. I choose life. I choose now. These are aspects of my life that I cannot ignore but I have the power to determine whether they control me or I control them.
To sum this up, I have learned that when I am feeling frustrated, overwhelmed and unable to cope, it is because I have lost sight of living in the NOW. It is because I am allowing the potholes life throws at all of us to control me. It is because I am living somewhere else which is not going to get me anywhere. Yes, my mother is ill and will pass away sometime soon as she is in the twilight of her life. When this happens I will grieve deeply, she is my mommy after all. I just know that the pain will lesson in time and as I do the grieving, I will remain open to those moments of joy and beauty life has to offer because through the grief and pain there is also to be found peace and connectedness with those who love and support me. I will love her NOW, and not worry about how I will love her after she is gone. Yes, my daughter is struggling and will continue to impact our family and our resources in negative ways not even possible to describe here or even always to imagine…but I have the power to choose to engage in the drama, or calmly deal with the situations as they arise and then give myself some respite in the oasis I have created for myself. Yes, my husband, as he goes through his worries, is impossible to deal with because of his hair-trigger temper and grumpy demeanor. I can fall into this and fight or take his outbursts personally, or I can control the situation by calmly establishing boundaries, holding firm to them and walking away when necessary. I CHOOSE. Yes, I can scream and cry WHY ME? What have I done to deserve this? I can choose to be resigned, to imagine that some alleged misdeed on my part has aligned the universe against me….or I can take control and say….it is what it is, I will deal with this in the way I choose is best for me. I am the best person I can be and am meant to be at this moment and that is enough. Life is enough. Peace is enough. My Joy may be quiet but it is there, it exists in the pain and overrides it, it lifts me up and shows me that right now, this moment, Life is being lived…
The sun streaming through my office window is bright, warm and uplifting….find YOUR joy now. I am sure that if you look around you or close your eyes and listen, you will find life is happening right now, it is good and you have the power and control to choose to acknowledge it, or not.
THE LAUGHING
“I love to laugh hahahahahaha” that wonderful song from Mary Poppins where they laugh and giggle and have tea on the ceiling. What a wonderful and ridiculous scene of happiness. In so many ways a metaphor for what laughter does. It makes you feel lighter, chases away the clouds, lifts the spirits and refreshes the soul. I know because I just finished laughing hysterically at a joke I played on my daughter.
My friends and I love to laugh. In fact, we take time to get away and spend happy weekends doing the things we each enjoy, one loves reading, one rubber stamping, scrap-booking, quilting…and sharing time, wine, great food and above all else, laughter. On one of our memorable trips, I was in a cute little country store where I picked up a sign for my house which really espouses my feelings and desires when it comes to my girlfriends…it says “Sit Long, Talk Much, Laugh Often”. Oh and did we laugh that weekend.
It all started when “S” a primary instigator of many a jovial moment, using her usual warped and twisted sense of humor, kept passing me on the highway to our cabin retreat by the lake. It was a glorious afternoon and the leaves were blazing with the colors of fall. Since I knew where the cabin was, she was supposed to follow me. Miffed, I passed her. Before I knew it she passed me. This continued on for a bit when, on one of her times of passing me, a glaring white bum squished up against the window nearly blinded me. “OH MY GOD ‘P’ IS MOONING US” I yelled to the group in my van. We stared in disbelief as I almost drove into the ditch…then came the laughter, the hysterical, uncontrollable laughter and giggles. It was so funny and what made it even funnier is that ‘P’ was not the type of person to do what she did. She was a proper Catholic Grandmother who always dotted her i’s, crossed her t’s, prayed for us all and knew what God and her mother expected of her. Somehow, ‘S’ the free spirit of our group of hens, used her humor to reach into ‘P’s’ soul and extricate that ridiculous and liberating act of complete and reckless abandon…
No funny act like that can go unavenged. As we passed them again wagging our fingers, ‘C’, no stranger to antics of her own, flashed her ample bosom at them and we sped away crying and sputtering with glee. What would our children think of us, their kind upright proper mommies and adult friends acting in such a ludicrous and childish manner? The thought only made everything even funnier. Thus began our weekend of mirth and unfortunately it ended far to soon.
For me, this gathering together of my friends and sisters in life, is what gives me perspective and feeds my soul, providing the strength it needs. So many churches and people look down on laughter and mirth. In fact, there are writings by the church fathers and saints about the evils of humour how inppropriate and bad for someone to laugh and be funny. They claim it takes away from a proper attitude of respect and worship for God.
Well, I am no theologian, but I say POPPYCOCK! If God didn’t want us to be happy or have a sense of humor, it wouldn’t be so healthy for us. People who laugh live longer, are healthier and spread happiness to those around them. They do not suck energy from a room, they give energy. In fact, my coffee mug at work says “PEACE. it does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble or hard work. it means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart”. Well, for me, laughter is a balm, a healing salve that leads to a lifting and feeling of contentment and peace.
Having said all of that, there are those who preach against mirth, merriment and laughter. In fact, there is an interesting article entitled “Joy versus Jokes” which can be read at http://www.jesusfamilies.org/Articles/JoyNotJokes.htm. I in no way want to disparage or condemn the author of this article because I do believe that many of his points are valid and accurate. Yet I firmly believe that to everything there is a season and there is a time and place for humour. I agree that too much of today’s christian preaching is about “entertainment” rather than witness to the true power and Word of God. Prayer is about quiet, meditative, sincere conversations with God. Yet there is in all things what is called balance. I believe that it is possible to be both sobor and respectful and also full of joy and laughter. Again, it is a matter of balance. The author of this article quotes Luke 6:25 namely “Woe to you who laugh now, For you shall mourn and weep.” I have also read this that A hermit saw someone laughing , and said to him, “We have to render an account of our whole life before heaven and earth, and you can laugh?” Sayings of the Desert Fathers. Yet what must be borne in mind completely and totally is the `context` in which these statements are made. I was looking at Bible commentaries and it becomes clear that yes, there is a form of humour and laughter that is truly inappropriate, especially when it hurts others, when it involves mocking God, Jesus, His Church, or destruction of His creation (again humour at the expense of someone else). It is also wrong when used to live in denial or masquerade of our sinful nature and the fallen state of the World. Nevertheless, I unequivocally believe that laughter is a gift from God, for us. This is why it can be warped and twisted because just as Satan can destroy other gifts of the Spirit, Satan will use and destroy the laughter and joy God gives us. Consider this Bible Commentary which talks about shallow people and how Luke 6:26 really talks about how people only think about now, what they own, what they enjoy, but that they have no hope in anything else to come, they have no true satisfaction and when this life ends, they will cry (Isaiah 65:13-14). Verse 26 specifically speaks to the fact that people will be miserable if they just live to be popular and funny and forget completely about God. Their message then is not true as they are false prophets (2 Peter 2:1).
Okay, enough of that, you get the point. Back to my journey. Recently, a young boy on the cusp of manhood, has come into my life, I believe led by the hand of God. His background is sad and unfortunate, with much misery and struggle. He now lives in my house and what astonishes me is his sense of humour and the joy he exudes in so many different aspects of his life. He does this IN SPITE OF the hardship he has endured at far too young an age. He is gifted in music and plays guitar like a pro. He enjoys many things with gusto and loves to play jokes (sometimes very gross jokes as he is a teenage boy after all) on my daughters and giggles at being able to freak them out. He recently posted on Facebook that he was thinking of his life up until now and was surprised he wasn’t in a mental institution. I firmly believe that the reason he is not institutionalized is through God’s work in his life and his goofy, irrascible sense of humour.
It is said that the family that prays together, stays together. Sadly, this has not born true in my life. What was missing in our family was laughter, mirth, giddiness, goofiness and sheer lunacy and fun. The soborness with which everything was dealt with lead to a breakdown in communication and the destruction of relationships. My daughters and I are on the mend, we are healing and we hope and pray that my husband and their father also finds peace and healing where he is now. It is humour that has pulled us through. It leads me to believe that the family that laughs together stays together.
In sharing this I want to thank those of you, my friends, my family and my `chosen` family, for the way your joy upholds me and let you know how much you all mean to me. I also challenge whoever reads this to find one thing today that moves you to laughter, be it a joke, a comic, a tickle, a story. Humour brings light to darkness, hope to the hopeless, respite from tension and pain. Just for today, do one unreasonable thing that moves you to laughter…who cares what anyone else thinks of you in fact, you may just be the one ray of sunshine and joy they find in their day.
“Blessed is he who makes his companions laugh.” ~ The Koran
HEALTHY…OR NOT…??…A RANT!
Arghhh, what’s a person who wants to amend their lifestyle supposed to do? One day something is “healthy” and the next “unhealthy”. It is so confusing, that if we didn’t need to eat at all, it would be easier on everyone.
I am trying to change my lifestyle, lift my brain fog and keep my hormones (which are gearing up for the major menopausal meltdown) under control. I want to lose my weight, be healthy, and add a good dose of exercise into the mix. What happens next? Everything is shot down. I almost expect Sheldon from the Big Bang theory to meet my blank stare with a ‘Bazinga’. If only.
I became hooked on margarine when my parents made the switch from butter years ago, because of their heart conditions and the high levels of “saturated fat” in butter. Since then, it appears that margarine is not necessarily good for us and moderate amounts of butter are better. Then, a bit later it appears that it’s the other way around. http://kerryg.hubpages.com/hub/Butter-or-Margarine-Which-is-Healthier
Next, artificial sweeteners. Yes, the word artificial says it all, but I grew up believing that this was the solution to sugar making one fat. Now we are told that artificial sweeteners cause all sorts of problems, including increasing weight gain, brain fog, and potentially causing seizures and some forms of cancer. So after years of drinking diet sodas, I am supposed to just say okay, I’m done, and not touch it again. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pvFRLIjOLOU
What about the healthily touted soy, which is appearing in increasing numbers of products and even products sold in health food stores. Drink Soy, Eat Soy, High Protein, Snack on Soy, Eat Eadamame, etc. Now, what is this product, touted as a miracle food, supposed to do to us? It creates fake Estrogens (phytoestrogens), a female hormone. It is not recommended except in tofu or tempeh form, for any woman, especially those with high breast cancer risk and not good for males who are being inundated with these false estrogens in our environment causing all sorts of problems. http://thyroid.about.com/cs/soyinfo/a/soy.htm
Last but not least, the newest and latest health article I have encountered….. http://www2.macleans.ca/2011/09/20/on-the-evils-of-wheat-why-it-is-so-addictive-and-how-shunning-it-will-make-you-skinny/ which is about the dangers of eating modern hybrid wheat. This is not to mention the antibiotic and growth hormone concerns surrounding the raising of livestock for feed, or the argument about disease ridden fish farms or natural fish toxified with mercury compounds….blah, blah, blah.
Suffice it to say, I could go on and on about other foods, other dangers, other disease-causing killers in “healthy” disguise. Sigh….and this leads to my rant. This is a rant because it is these types of things, along with cravings and guilt, that cause PITA (the name I gave my Pain in the Ass voice in my head) free rein to derail all my healthy plans. ” Just give up….enjoy whatever tastes best….it’s going to kill you and make you fat anyways so who cares….life’s too short to worry about this…it’s in your genes, you’ll never do it….look you drank diet soda for years and now they say that’s why you are fat….hey remember all that soy veggie stuff you enjoyed so much….look it killed your thyroid that’s why you on meds so you’ll never be thin and healthy….”and PITA drones on and on.
Now, I like a good excuse as much as the next guy and I am certainly not denying that I am my worst enemy when it comes to excuses and reasons why I cannot lose weight. Yet I can’t help but think that all the hype about appetite suppression, fat burning, metabolic issues, what’s healthy, what’s not healthy, why THIS ONE DIET IS THE LAST ONE YOU WILL EVER DO, etc., is contributing to North America’s obesity epidemic and the related diseases. In fact, I believe it is just as much a factor in causes of obesity as preservatives, lack of understanding about portion control, saturated and trans fats, chemicals, fast food, poorly designed neighbourhoods that don’t encourage walking, and sooo much more. It allows us to have excuses, in fact all the excuses that someone like me can manufacture. Oh and before I forget, there is all the exercise mis-information too like… do cardio to lose weight/don’t do cardio because it won’t burn fat; lift weights to burn fat/don’t lift weights cause when you stop it’ll turn to fat; reduce stress cause it’s giving you belly fat/get that adrenaline pumping, it’ll raise your heart rate and get your metabolism pumping; no pain no gain/walking is great…ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
I have heard all of these statements and more at one time or another in my life. How exactly do these things contribute to my lack of motivation? Why do I need to stop being told about what is now considered unhealthy or the newest reason I am “obese” ? This needs to stop because, the more I read, the more confused I become. The more contradictory the statements the more I don’t believe anything. The more I disbelieve anything, the more hopeless I become. The more hopeless I become, the more I want to fill that hopelessness with food as a result of my need to emotionally heal my hurts and then suddenly BAM! I have one potatoe chip and it leads to a motibreak. Yes, that is my new way of phrasing it…a motibreak. My motivation becomes broken from being dragged up and down from hope in the newest research to despair because of the newest research, and everything in between.
Conclusion for me is….all good and natural things in moderation. I am going to choose to eat as per my food guide, choosing things as natural and preservative free as possible. I am going to continue to see my weight loss counsellors to keep me on track and encourage me, especially in regards to emotional eating. Lastly, when I feel a big motibreak coming on, I REFUSE TO LISTEN TO A WORD PITA WHISPERS to me and remind myself that I love me, I am happy, I am soo doing this and no matter what, in the end it is not about sizes, numbers, fashion or acceptance. I AM BEAUTIFUL! I DESERVE TO BE HEALTHY! I WILL DETERMINE FOR ME AND ME ALONE, WHAT IS HEALTHY, BECAUSE I KNOW MORE THAN ANY SCIENTIST ABOUT HOW I FEEL AND WHAT I CAN DO!
Okay, Motibreak over, back to work!.
ON GOD, GOOD FRIENDS & DOGS
A strange title at first glance but not so much…not any worse than “old dogs and children and watermelon wine” and if you know where that line comes from, you are closer to my age than not.
I was reminded yesterday of all the good things God has worked in my life, the day to day ‘miracles’ that are so easy to ignore or put off as coincidence or good timing…yet I know better.
I just finished dealing with the Bathoom renovation from Hell, (haven’t we all had some type of nightmare like this, the more they take apart the more issues they find?). My first contractor was AWOL/MIA and had been partially paid. The second one was great but even he was not happy with this job. Everytime he called me I swear the phone didn’t ring, it just went CHA CHINGGGGG CHA CHINGGGGG making the sound my money makes when it leaves my bank and goes into somebody elses pocket. Now when I am treating myself, that sound makes me smile but when I am emptying out bank accounts and forced on a budget for repairs….I am not a very happy girl. Nevertheless, I have to be grateful to God as he provides for me in all cases.
I found myself reverting back to old habits…worrying…where am I going to get the extra money, how am I going to pay this man, what’s he going to think if I can’t give it all to him….etc. That was the first red flag and a sign that I needed to “Let Go and Let God” something I learned many years ago but still forget to practice. Humbly I bowed my head and prayed…Help me Lord, I need to figure this out. Now let me tell you that God is way faster and delivers way quicker than any loans officer at the bank. I received a phone call that day from a tenant telling me that they wanted to pay the rent until the end of December and could they drop it off this week, all three months worth. After I got off the phone, I thanked God for his providence. Some people may not believe but this is just the type of everyday mundane miracle he has pulled off in my life regularly. He doesn’t make my life a utopian paradise, but he’s there to hold me, guide me, comfort me and ensure I have what I need when I need it.
That’s where friends come in. I read somewhere once that our friends are the angels God has sent to us. Since angels are messangers, I believe that He uses us as His “angels” and we are messengers to each other for Him.
I recently received some bad news about the health of a relative. It turns out that they are struggling with a possible diagnosis of Fibromyalgia. It was very debilitating and not something that was confirmed so no real treatment had started.
Early next morning, I dropped my children off for school when I called a friend of mine who had struggled with this condition. It was early and she is always an early riser so I thought nothing of calling at 8:30 am. Her groggy voice indicated that she was in bed still and I felt mortified as I hate waking people up and usually don’t call anyone until 10:00 am. Well, it turns out that it was meant to be.
She was my angel that day and I hope I was hers. She gave me all the information I needed, promised to pray for my family in her prayer group she was attending, and admitted she was struggling very much with some recent events that had taken place concerning her adult children. She told me that God wanted me to call her that day so she could stop feeling the weight of the world, get out of bed, get to her prayer meeting and enjoy the spectacular fall day that was laid out before her. I was able to deliver a message from God that he wanted her to take care of herself, be present and enjoy what he created and beauty around us and she was able to deliver the message I needed to relay to my relative. When we finished our call we both went away feeling rejuvenated, refreshed and hopeful. We also were brought out of our concerns and into the present…because when we are not in the present, we miss the beautiful colors of fall and the crisp clean air indicating winter is not far away.
My day ended on a very positive note because not only did God give me this experience, he gave me a final good night chuckle. I came home to a letter in the mail for me, which is rare because I get bills, not letters. Another friend of mine had taken a number of funny pages from an old daily calendar which had comics on them. She tucked them into a printout of a moving and meaningful Native proverb on love, and mailed it to me with a note saying…for moments to take when you need a laugh.
If this is not God nurturing and ministering to me through his angels (my good friends) than I don’t know what is and I cannot begin to share my gratitude for his love, the gift of hope and for their thoughts of me.
Lastly, I touch on the dogs……mine and others. I believe that they too have a place in God’s plan and I am grateful. Grateful to my friend with Fibromyalgia who enjoyed her prayer group and then took her dog for a long walk in the beauty of fall. Grateful to my other friend whose dog lay on my feet and kept them warm while we filled out a jewellery order from a party I had, and last but not least, my Scruffy, my companion who loves me, massages my toes and snuggles with me every night. Yet some faiths believe that animals have no soul….pssshhh, I know better!
Thank you God, for all this I am truly grateful as you have richly and abundantly blessed me in more ways than I can count.
I AM WOMAN (HEAR ME WHIMPER)
Alas, I started my blog with such high hopes of recording my journey into the unknown. Suffice it to say it is amazing how something as minor as the common cold can result in laying one low for so long.
My last few weeks were great….15 lbs down and an overall loss of 27 1/2 inches and finally, I can get into the jeans I never wore, can bend over and wear my fancy sandals. These are all exciting things I wanted to sit down and write about to remind myself of how fantastic this feels. Only someone who has struggled with weight loss and the difficulties being obese present, can truly understand how wonderful it is to be able to do things that most people take for granted. Those who have never struggled with weight, never dieted, never huffed and puffed just to put on their underwear, will never know the pure joy that pervades being able to do the things just mentioned, and all with only a 15 lb loss. Imagine the future once I have completed my lifestyle alteration.
Alas WHAM! Laid low by a measly little irritant like the common cold. What boggles my mind is here I am finally, eating healthy, getting enough rest, taking care of myself and KABOOM! Like a bolt of lightening I not only get a cold, but a damn nasty one at that. This one does not respond to the conventional treatment of sleeping it off and is nastier than any I have had in years. Makes one want to cry. Fortunately, I am too sick to eat but that doesn’t exactly help my efforts either because whatever weight loss I experience will be short lived by the rebound gain as a result of my body adjusting again to food. Feast/famine cycle, here we go.
I will be back on track soon, and hopefully keeping this journey up to date. In the meantime, I am woman, hear me whimper, and if you are so inclined I could use some chicken soup…but low fat and no noodles please, only vegetables…..does anyone know how to make calorie free comfort food mac and cheese????
